I’m 80. I’m old. I’m also overweight. I weigh 140 pounds on a good day. I don’t think I’m too old to lose that weight. But my doctor does. And that worries me.
Now that I’m an 80-something, is my doctor applying a new set of rules to my care? Is he assuming that at 80 I haven’t much longer to live, so why ask this poor old lady to go on a diet? Why not let her be plump for the measly years she has left?
Worse, is my doctor applying those 80-something rules to other areas of my care? Will he assume that my heart, my lungs, my knees and my feet are also beyond repair and not worth bothering with?
That’s what worries me. Given my family history, I could live another two decades. I’d like to feel good for those 20 years. But even if the time I have left on the planet is much less than that, I still have time, and I want to make the most of it.
Too Old to Lose That Weight?
I’m old, but I’m not feeble. Not yet. Right now, I feel like I expected to feel at age 60 — a little stiff in the joints, a little slow on the uptake (I was only mildly helpful during a visit to an escape room last weekend. The younger folks are so much quicker.)
But I’m all here. I’ve got most of my marbles. I Zumba and Spin with the 40-somethings. I sit down once a week to write a cogent missive to my readers. I remember to turn off the burner before taking my veggie burger off the stove.
I’m not too old to lose that weight.
Three years ago that same doctor, my internist, wanted me to lose 15 pounds. Losing those extra pounds would do wonders, he said — for my knees, my feet, my slightly elevated A1c and cholesterol. It might even help the GERD I’ve been experiencing for the past few years. And the windedness.
Several other doctors have told me the same thing — the endocrinologist weighed in on the A1c, the cardiologist on my 220 cholesterol levels, the podiatrist on the plantar fasciitis, the physical therapist on the creaky knees, the gastroenterologist on the GERD and the windedness.
This Old Age Thing
Here’s my concern as I embark upon this old age thing. Will my doctors look at me and see that I haven’t as many years ahead of me as a 40-year-old or a 60-year-old? Will they calculate the cost-benefits and conclude that any new ailments aren’t worth treating?
Will my doctors give up on me? That worries me. So I’m sending my doctor a copy of this essay.
More about that getting older thing at “The Shame of Aging.” Also, “A Child Is Born, and So Is a Grandpa.”
“You’re too old to lose weight,” an AGEIST or a SEXIST might say! Does your doctor know that your mother and both grandmothers lived well into their nineties, even almost 100 years? Your maternal grandma lived that long while smoking all the while.
That’s right. I forgot about our maternal grandmother’s smoking. But did she smoke into her 90s? And didn’t she finally get lung cancer or chronic lung disease of some kind — but not until she was in her 90s?
When I started reading this, I thought maybe your doctor was looking at things from an orthopedic view – that a moderate overweight level helps your bones to stay strong. Once one gets over 80, particularly for women, I think, it also becomes important to have enough weight so that if you suffer an injury or get pretty sick for a while, you don’t lose enough weight (and muscle mass) to be considered fragile. And, when you are immobilized for a long time, you are not keeping your muscles toned, and when one gets older, you really need your protein increased so you can keep making muscle. I even went looking for an article that might address that and readily found this:
https://www.aarp.org/health/healthy-living/info-2019/weight-concerns-after-80.html
But as I read on, I saw just how strong you are and how much you are exercising – and I wondered if you doctor knew just how much you are working to stay strong. Maybe he’ll be reassured to read your article – and only ask you to make sure you don’t overdo the weight loss, and don’t try to do it too quickly. But he should have explained some of the above to you, if that’s what he was thinking about!
Judith, I checked out the AARP article you mention and, yes, it makes some important points that I need to be aware of. (Readers — check it out!)
I suspect my doctor was thinking of some of these things, but did not have time to elaborate (not his fault — we had a lot else to discuss in the allotted time). I do have some osteoporosis, so I’ll talk this over with my endocrinologist next time I see him.
I’m chuckling. There’s a lot of irony at work here — if I lose weight, I’ll be more agile and less likely to fall. But if I do fall I won’t have my nice padding to protect me!
So glad you are sending this riff to your MD. You are taking care of yourself. Go Zumba, Escape Room, writing and all your other activities. Keep that beautiful smile!!!
I’m smiling today. Maybe it’s the Zumba I did yesterday that’s putting me in a good mood.
Please let us know how your doctor responds to your letter. I hope he is ashamed. Joy
Joy. I put a copy of this post in the mail to him yesterday. I tried to write the post in a way that would not hurt his feelings. He’s a very attentive doctor.
So glad you were able to escape the room. I wish I could have participated in that challenge.
As for losing the weight at “your age,” what is the reason your doctor says you can’t, or shouldn’t? I faced a bit of this age discrimination when pregnant with my first child at age 36, but the pregnancy, birth, and postpartum recovery went as ideally as possible. Not all 80-year-olds are the same, and you’re doing far better physically than most, I’d say. Thank goodness you have a house with a lot of stairs. As Ruth said, to age well, you must live in a house with lots of stairs.
Oh! Thanks for that message from Ruth. She had a nice tall staircase, that’s for sure. This house is in three stories, with my writing room on the bottom floor and the bedrooms and garage up top. I get a big workout every time is misplace my purse.
I like your last line! The doctor needs to know! Extra weight is dangerous for older people because it increases the likelihood of falling. Many seniors die as a result of falls.
Good point. The extra weight makes it hard to keep your balance. And . . . does it mean you fall harder than you otherwise would???
I feel the same way as you about age. Not liking it.
Sigh . . .